Sunday, May 25, 2008

An Open Letter to Canadians

Attention Canadians who cross the border to shop in the U.S. :

Yes, we know you’ve been here, in greater numbers lately. And do you know how we know you’ve been here? Not because you’re doing a great job stimulating our economy (Wal-Mart will survive, with or without you). Nor is it the hordes of middle-aged women (and older) with Big Hair, pancake make-up, and sparkly silver and gold sandals. No.

Just a quick look at the parking lots of major stores is all it takes to know that Canadians have been here. And I don’t mean your license plates. It’s the litter.

Yes, I know, Americans litter too, but not like you.

Americans do not routinely walk into a store, buy a new pair of shoes, and abandon their old pair in the parking lot.

We do not park our RV’s at the mall, pack the cupboards with new items (even a new TV), throw all the empty packaging out the door, and drive away.

We do not drain the oil from our vehicles in your parking lots, pour in the new oil we just bought, and leave the empty plastic oil bottles wherever we dropped them.

Gotta pretend none of it is new, so you don’t have to pay duty on it, don’t you?

And you wonder why we mock you.

To my Canadian friends, thank you for NOT behaving like your ethically-challenged countrymen. Maybe you could have a talk with some of them.

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